Domingo é meu aniversário e estou feliz. Não achei que fosse estar. Vinte e sete anos era a minha idade do medo, muito mais do que trinta ou qualquer outra. Acho que a próxima, agora, só oitenta, porque quando você tem oitenta não importa o espírito, aos oitenta você é velho mesmo. Aos vinte e sete anos, por sua vez, você está mais perto dos trinta do que dos vinte e não tem mais desculpa. Tudo bem que aos vinte e seis você também já estava. Mas aos vinte e seis sempre há a possibilidade de dizer que você tem pouco mais de vinte e cinco anos. Aos vinte e sete isso não cola mais.
Nas últimas semanas pensei alguns pensamentos típicos dos angustiados com a morte e o tempo e blá, com a ansiedade de quem acha que a serenidade heideggeriana não passa de um imenso dum blefe. Vinte e sete anos e não li as obras completas de Freud, não escrevi obras-primas, não curei pacientes, não ganhei milhões, não trepei adoidado. Engraçado que nunca tive essa angústia-clichê do tempo que passou e não volta nunca mais. Meu clichê é o oposto, da angústia justamente com aquilo que não vou ter tempo de viver.
Esses pensamentos negativos costumam vir na virada do ano, junto com o réveillon do Faustão – nunca em aniversário. Aniversário costuma ser apenas uma desculpa muitíssimo bem-vinda para as pessoas que eu amo e que não falam comigo desde o último quinze de março me ligarem. Aniversário é também a oportunidade de quem já me liga todo dia me dizer, ei, que legal que eu tenho você para ligar todo dia! Eu gosto muito, sempre gostei demais de aniversário. Talvez por isso os tais pensamentos vieram – e como vieram, foram. Talvez também porque cada dia mais tenho gostado muito da minha vidinha medíocre. É muito bom não depender de curas fantásticas, textos escalafobéticos ou trepadas acrobáticas para viver de um jeito leve e salgado (eu deveria dizer doce, mas a verdade é que sempre fui da turma que corre para a mesa das coxinhas e empadinhas em festa de criança). Vejam que não tenho nada contra as coisas fantásticas. Mas tenho tudo a favor da Tuesday Wonderland. Tuesday Wonderland é o nome de um disco do E.S.T. de que gosto muito – do disco e do nome. O nome fala sobre o que é a música. A música, na verdade, é uma coisa muito besta. Como uma terça-feira qualquer. Mas, para quem é curioso e se dispõe a olhar de perto, a música e a terça-feira podem, quem sabe, oferecer um terreno de possibilidades maravilhosas.
Assim venho tentando olhar e cuidar das minhas feiras, evitando jogar tudo para o sábado.
Então já que no aniversário do Alex a gente foi para o campo, no meu a gente vai para a praia passar o fim-de-semana numa cabana. No Alabama.
Nessas horas eu me lembro da frase de caminhão: “não tenho tudo o que desejo, mas desejo tudo o que tenho”. É isso: estarei exatamente onde quero, com quem eu quero, fazendo tudo o que quero. Eu tenho vários outros cenários montados de aniversários perfeitos, claro. Mas esse certamente é um deles.
Domingo é meu aniversário e estou feliz.


on Mar 14th, 2009 at 12:21 am
ainda bem que jah na primeira linha vc avisa q estah feliz, neh? imagina o post q escreveria se estivesse triste e deprimida! :)
on Mar 14th, 2009 at 9:25 am
hei, mestra, te desejo feliz complet’anos, ok? de coração! nada de pensamento negativo. bola pra frente.
se serve de consolo, eu ia morrendo atropelado 1 DIA após fazer 25 anos, ou seja, em 1º de março, só porque atravessei uma faixa da avenida olhando para o lado de onde os carros NÃO vinham. isso é que ia ser azar, não é verdade? tu vai fazer 27 e vai pra uma cabana, então, sorria! :-p
on Mar 14th, 2009 at 10:54 am
Parabem, Camilla!
te mandei um presente!
on Mar 14th, 2009 at 5:11 pm
Parabéns, aproveite bem seu dia!
Hahaha, achei gozadíssimos seus comentários sobre os 27 anos.
Ass.: Janaína, 61 anos
on Mar 14th, 2009 at 8:38 pm
Camila, querida, tomara que seja não apenas estupidamente feliz no seu aniversário, mas feliz de formas incomuns e surpreendentes também!
Beijo grande!
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 4:45 am
ainda é muito cedo para a angústia do tempo desperdiçado – o que é bom, pois assim, você tem a chance de não desperdiça-lo. aproveite o sol, o mar, o peixe. e que o novo ano de vida continue a trazer a felicidade que vens vivendo.
um abraço forte e um beijo grande, parabéns!
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 7:15 am
Camilet´s, vamo que vamo. Muita coisa ainda pela frente. Vai ter todo tipo de wonderland possivel e imaginario. Voce merece. beijos.tato
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 3:15 pm
parabéeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennns!!!!
*abraços*
e mais abraços a serem dados pessoalmente em breve! ebaaa!!
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
(ah, link novo, no wordpress, esqueci de atualizar o comentário heheh.)
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 6:41 pm
Dê um jeito de continuar sendo assim pra sempre. Parabéns pelos 27.!
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 6:56 pm
Camila,
Parabéns!
Nem sei ao certo o que me levou a escrever aqui neste exato momento…..talvez só a vontade de desejar-lhe toda a felicidade do mundo e aproveito o ensejo para dizer que seus textos são bacanérrimos!!!! Sabe quando alguma coisa acontece com a gente e não tem explicação??Pois é, um dia li seu texto e ele fez uma diferença naquele dia específico, no momento que eu tava passando, enfim…daí como as linhas me agradaram…fui ficando, fui lendo, adorando e hoje resolvi te parabenizar.Mesmo sem escrever comentários, continuarei seguindo este blog delicioso.
Saudações baianas
Ps: Eu sou totalmente analfabyte….não tenho muito saco para essas coisas de net….em que pese meu estado atual de vício em acompanhar alguns blogs bacanas que conheci desde a primeira leitura no blog do meu conterrâneo Franciel Cruz ( que é rubro-negro também), um gênio na escrita….enfim, estou viciada (comecei a ler no trabalho e agora até nos finais de semana….).Enfim, acabo de chegar do jogo do brioso leão e tenho que pensar em algo para preparar no jantar….
Era só isso: vontade de parabenizá-la.
Seguirei lendo
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Seu medo não é tão infundado assim:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/4995546/Old-age-begins-at-27-as-mental-powers-start-to-decline-scientists-find.html
Sorry pela notícia ruim, mas não pude deixar de notar a coincidência quando li esse artigo. De qualquer forma, parabéns!
on Mar 15th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
Bom, vou confessar que já faz um tempo que eu não entrava no seu blog, mas já que você não apareceu online no MSN hoje, entro aqui só pra te desejar “Happy Birthday”!!
P.S.: foi com 27 anos que eu entrei no Silver Level do Marathon Maniacs, por ter corrido 8 maratonas em um ano, rsrs. Antes disso, só tinha corrido uma com 26, e agora corri uma ultra (50 km), já com 28.
on Mar 16th, 2009 at 5:31 am
Feliz aniversário à distância, Camila! Mas ora pois, se a notícia acima do Sr. Roberto que informa que o declínio de nossa mente começa aos 27 anos for um fato cientificamente comprovado, é de se supoire que 27 anos depois nossa mente tenha a capacidade sorvedoira de uma ostra, que é minha idade atual. E a vovó Nina, que tem 81 anos já destruiu duas mentes nessa vida! Ora iessa, então comemoremos, porque voce tem uma uma, duas, talvez tres mentes inteiras pela frente para desconstruire!
Parabéns e beijos!
on Mar 16th, 2009 at 8:31 am
Cami, parabéns atrasado!! Não tinha reparado na data do teu post, por isso quando comecei a lê-lo hj de manhã achei que vc era do dia 22. “Hum, injustamente ariana essa Camila. Estava mais para pisciana, com certeza”, pensei eu. Qual não foi a minha surpresa quando vi que teu aniversário era dia 15!!! Ahá! Então meu feeling não está tão mal assim, hehehe. :-) Um grande abraço felicidades pra vc. Depois de amanhã é minha vez. ;-)
on Mar 16th, 2009 at 6:58 pm
Felicidades, Camila!
P.S:Quanto a essas teorias “involutivas” da mente, não há com o que se preocupar, já que o cérebro, hoje em dia, é apenas uma ficção forjada para vender tomografias computadorizadas e ressonâncias magnéticas.
on Mar 16th, 2009 at 10:13 pm
Findo o primeiro dia dos meus 27 anos, devo dizer que ele não foi muito diferente de um dos meus dias de 26. Mas certamente foi diferente de um dos meus dias de 20, então who knows – a gente só repara nas mudanças muito tempo depois que elas aconteceram mesmo. Isto posto, um obrigada geral e algumas respostas em particular:
Querido editor, folgo em constatar que continuamos vivos – afinal, citando Alex, não morrer deve ser sempre a nossa prioridade número 1. Beijos!
Jasão: recebido, obrigada!
Janaina, estamos aqui para isso mesmo: divertir o público com nossas mazelas existenciais. :-)
Ricardo, querido, choveu tanto no meu aniversário que a água ultrapassou em muito a largura dos meus ombros! :-D
dani, é muito, muito bom te ver por aqui. Saudades.
Tato, obrigada por todas as wonderlands que você já me apresentou. Este fim de semana mesmo ouvi o Gaucho, que você me deu de presente quando fiz 18 anos (lembra?). Tenho muita saudade dos nossos sábados wonderlândicos. Beijos.
lu: obrigadaaaaaaaaa! E o parabéns é meio que recíproco, né, pela casinha nova. :-)
Francisco, eu sou a rainha da procrastinação e da inércia, então é capaz mesmo que eu não mude muito não. Beijos!
Terê, desse jeito você me obriga a arriscar um oxe em público. Então vamos lá: oxe, que parabéns mais bacana o seu! Obrigada por ter dado forma à sua vontade de me parabenizar. Espero que o blog continue te interessando – e, em sendo este o caso, que você venha à tona vez ou outra, se não for pedir demais. :-) Saudações paulisto-nova-orleanianas!
Roberto, a notícia só não me preocupa porque caminhamos inexoravelmente rumo à ruína, destruição, choro e ranger de dentes desde, deixa ver… Ah sim, desde que nascemos. Obrigada pelos parabéns!
Batata, na boa, quem merece os parabéns aqui é você. Tudo o que eu fiz nos últimos 366 dias foi não morrer. Beijos!
Papai – hahahahahaha! É isso aí, vamos desconstruir a mente que atrás vem gente.
Luiza, parabéns adiantados – pelo aniversário e principalmente pelos seus conhecimentos astrológicos. Nos falamos depois de amanhã!
Mariano, duplamente obrigada – pelos votos de felicidade e por me fazer lembrar de Nelson Rodrigues. Tô seguindo o conselho dele para os jovens!
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 4:18 am
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 4:23 am
Apple now has Rhapsody as an app, which is a great start, but it is currently hampered by the inability to store locally on your iPod, and has a dismal 64kbps bit rate. If this changes, then it will somewhat negate this advantage for the Zune, but the 10 songs per month will still be a big plus in Zune Pass’ favor.
on Nov 26th, 2011 at 4:43 am
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 4:50 am
The Zune concentrates on being a Portable Media Player. Not a web browser. Not a game machine. Maybe in the future it’ll do even better in those areas, but for now it’s a fantastic way to organize and listen to your music and videos, and is without peer in that regard. The iPod’s strengths are its web browsing and apps. If those sound more compelling, perhaps it is your best choice.
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 5:32 am
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 6:31 am
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 6:37 am
This is getting a bit more subjective, but I much prefer the Zune Marketplace. The interface is colorful, has more flair, and some cool features like ‘Mixview’ that let you quickly see related albums, songs, or other users related to what you’re listening to. Clicking on one of those will center on that item, and another set of “neighbors” will come into view, allowing you to navigate around exploring by similar artists, songs, or users. Speaking of users, the Zune “Social” is also great fun, letting you find others with shared tastes and becoming friends with them. You then can listen to a playlist created based on an amalgamation of what all your friends are listening to, which is also enjoyable. Those concerned with privacy will be relieved to know you can prevent the public from seeing your personal listening habits if you so choose.
on Nov 26th, 2011 at 6:40 am
I’ll gear this review to 2 types of people: current Zune owners who are considering an upgrade, and people trying to decide between a Zune and an iPod. (There are other players worth considering out there, like the Sony Walkman X, but I hope this gives you enough info to make an informed decision of the Zune vs players other than the iPod line as well.)
on Nov 26th, 2011 at 7:17 am
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on Nov 26th, 2011 at 8:08 am
The Zune concentrates on being a Portable Media Player. Not a web browser. Not a game machine. Maybe in the future it’ll do even better in those areas, but for now it’s a fantastic way to organize and listen to your music and videos, and is without peer in that regard. The iPod’s strengths are its web browsing and apps. If those sound more compelling, perhaps it is your best choice.
on Nov 26th, 2011 at 8:08 am
Sorry for the huge review, but I’m really loving the new Zune, and hope this, as well as the excellent reviews some other people have written, will help you decide if it’s the right choice for you.
on Nov 26th, 2011 at 8:59 am
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